Got milk?

I had an interesting conversation with Luke today about milk while having lunch at Arbys.

"Mom, where does milk come from?" asked Luke.

I responded, "From cows of course."

"No, but how do they get it out, do they pee it out?" asked Luke.

"Uh - no, that would be gross. It comes out of their udders." I said confidently.

Luke, with a confused look on his face, continued by asking, "Well, what are udders?"

At this point I wasn't sure how I was going to explain them, so non-chalantly I said, "udders are kind of like boobs." (You tell me how you'd explain them any better!)

Luke looked at me with grin on his face and said, "Yeah, cows have Moobs!"

A 4 Year Old Perspective on Breakfast

It was breakfast time and I asked the boys what they would like to eat.

Luke responds, "How about those hot dogs."

I was a little perplexed with his response and told him he couldn't have hot dogs for breakfast but to pick some cereal.

He told me he wanted hot dog cereal. Here I sit wondering if someone seriously 'invented' hot dog cereal, which would be nasty and I can't imagine anyone would eat it, but these days anything is possible.

I open the pantry to give him some options (other than hot dog cereal) and start reading them to him.

Chocolate cheerios?

No.

Apple Jacks?

No.

Lucky Charms?

No.

(Yes, we like our cereal loaded with sugar.)

Then I pull out the box of Honey Smacks (puffed wheat cereal). I look at the picture and think to myself, surely he can't mean this?

I show him the box and ask if this is what he wants. He responds, "Yeah, the hot dog cereal!"

I guess from a 4 year olds perspective they do kind of look like mini hot dog buns.

The letter H

Today's letter of the day is brought to you by Luke.

It was letter H day at preschool. Each child was to wear a crazy hat. Luke choose a motorcycle helmet - how clever. They had a healthy snack and worked on their H homework.

I picked Luke up after school and he handed me his papers from the day. I looked over them and was happy with his handiwork. He continued to tell me about the sound that the letter H makes, "hhhhaa."

"Very good," I replied and continued to say words that began with the h sound making sure I enunciated the beginning h sound of each word, "hhhhouse, hhhat, hhhelp."

Luke gave it a try and responded, "hhhhzebra."

We'll keep working on that letter H.

Battle scars

First, it was the end of April when Luke slipped off the couch-fort him and his brothers made and smacked his chubby little cheek on the coffee table causing a nasty gash. It didn't phase him much.

Then there was a bee sting 3 weeks ago that left his poor little ear red and swollen. There were no apparent stingers, so a good icing and a some motrin and he was good to go.

Or so I thought.

(He was not too happy about this event and told me that bees are no longer his friend.)

A week later he complained of his ear being hot and itchy. I called the doctor's office and they felt he should come in to be seen. We find out that his ear was infected and gets put on an antibiotic for a week. That seemed to do the trick.

Then 2 days ago the boys were riding their bikes in circles in the garage. Luke made a quick turn and down he went smacking his forehead onto the hard concrete floor. He's got a nice shiner to show for it.

This boy sure has had his share of battle scars the past few months. And through it all, he's still such a cutie-pie!

Put some clothes on.

I was searching around the other day for new ab workout ideas and came across some old workout video tapes (yes, as in VHS). Back in the day before I became a gym rat I did these videos in the comfy privacy of my pajamas home.

For old times sake (and a really good laugh) I put in my Arms and Abs of Steel video from 1992.

Wow.

The workout was pretty good and I am going to steal use a few of her moves, but the outfit and the hair and the music and did I mention the outfit?

O.M.G!

The box should seriously have had a warning label on it. WARNING: Bad feathered bangs sticking out of a cycling hat straight from the 80's, bright blinding white workout shoes with stretched out tube socks, and lack of clothing. She had on a green sports bra - ok I get that, even though you wouldn't catch me wearing one by itself. But seriously, panty hose and a matching green thong! What?!?!

Luke was sitting with me watching it and I felt like I should have been covering his eyes. His comment said it all. He asked, "Mom, why is that lady naked?"

Priceless.

Excuse you Luke.

Luke watches his video over and over again and gets the biggest kick out of it.

Some things should not be bought in bulk.

Such as syrup.

You may be asking yourself, "but why not?"

This is why not.

It's not very fun trying to clean up a full 1/2 gallon of sticky, gooey, ant-inviting syrup that spilled all over the kitchen floor and under the refrigerator.

So not cool!

Luke thought he would make himself a waffle and climbed up the cabinet to reach the syrup that was on the top shelf. It slipped right out of his hands and BAM - the plastic bottle burst open. Ugh!

Even after the tedious clean up process, the floor still has a tacky feel to it and our kitchen is permeated with the smell of maple.

The last time Luke tried to make himself a snack all by himself this is what happened.

Can you even guess what that is a picture of?

That would be a burnt corn dog with the plastic wrapper melted around it.

Not being able to read yet, he pushed whatever button looked right to him. 4 minutes later - ta da - burnt carcinogen on a stick.

Tomorrow is his first day of preschool. I hope he doesn't get put on snack duty.

Times sure have changed.

Luke, being 4 years old, still has issues with keeping dry. He gets so wrapped up in what he's doing that he'll forget to take potty breaks unless I remind him to.

After the gym this evening we decided to meet up with some friends for dinner. After we were done eating I noticed Luke's pants were damp. We came home and I cleaned him up for the night, but was quite frustrated.

I asked Luke, "What is it going to take to get you to remember to stop and use the potty before it's too late?"

He replied, "I don't know."

So I said, "What if I buy you something? How about that?" Thinking he'd really go for that idea and ask for candy or a small toy, etc.

You know what my 4 year old boy said he wanted?

An ipod!

These boys are something else!

Here is another installment of my on going series of kid sayings that my 3 boys supply me with. The majority of today's excerpts come from Luke who recently turned 4 years old. It's a great dose of humor that makes me smile. I hope it does the same for you.

____________________________________

I asked Luke what he wanted for lunch and he said, "The crab macaroni." Not sure what he meant I asked him to explain it. He said, "the sea shell kind." Oh- you mean the Kraft Shells and Cheese? Yep.

____________________________________

Luke and I were petting Fritz, my parent's dog during one of his rare quiet and calm moments. Luke laid his head on the dog's chest and said, "His heart is wiggling, no, it's bumping."

____________________________________

While walking to the gym in the parking lot Carson spotted a cloth on the ground. He pointed at it and said, "Look someones hank chief."

____________________________________

Luke was eating a popsicle and I look over at him and see him giving it kisses. He noticed me watching him and said, "Mom, this is Princess Leia."

____________________________________

Luke being under 4 feet tall was standing between my dad and I as we were having a conversation. Luke interrupts us and bluntly states, "Papa, you have boogers in your nose."

_____________________________________

I had a hard work out at the gym and at home I was sitting at the table with my eyes closed. I told Luke that all I wanted to do was go to bed. Luke replied, "Well, walk upstairs! Are you old?"

_____________________________________

I yelled to Luke in the other room and asked him if he had his flip flops on. He replied, "No, I just have my feet on."

Keeping up with the big kids.

Only 10 short days ago my baby turned 4 years old.  And look at what he's doing today.  This was entirely his decision.  He came up to me and asked me to take his training wheels off.  I was a little hesitant at first, but agreed to let him try.  There were no crashes, skinned knees or tears.  Just a very brave boy who's growing up too fast.  

I'm so proud of him, but in a way it is bittersweet.  First it's a bike, then next thing you know he'll be driving off in a car.  I don't think I'll ever be ready for that moment.  I'll just take it one milestone at a time.

Four

Today marks my baby's 4th birthday.  

05-05-05

Pretty sweet date to be born on, wouldn't you say?  Yes, it was sort of planned.  I was past my due date and the doctor wanted to induce me on the 3rd.  I was totally not going for that date (5-3-05)  If any of you are familiar with a certain bank by that name you'd understand.  Especially the fact that I worked at that said bank for 6 years.  I didn't need my son to carry on the mark of my previous employers name.  So I decided on the 5th.  How can you forget that day?  Plus it's Cinco de Mayo - Luke's going to totally thank me when he gets older.  Par-tay!

L - loving and laid back 

U - unique and understanding

K - kindhearted and keen

E -  entertaining and enjoyable

My dear little baby boy Luke.  You are 4 years old today, yet you act so much more mature.  You are years ahead of others your age in regards to your agility and fearless attitude.  But then again, you sort of have to be like that in order to keep up with your two older brothers.  

I love that you are your own person.  You have such a wonderful blend of rough and tumble mixed with compassion and cuddles.  You are so smart and catch on to things very quickly.  You have this amazing ability to to prove your mom and dad wrong with the things you're capable of doing on your own.  

I enjoy seeing your independence grow each day, but still love the baby side of you when you crawl onto my lap and snuggle into my chest.  

You give us so much love and joy my Luke-man.  Enjoy this adventure into the next year of your life my son.  

Happy 4th Birthday Luke!

Goodbye sippy cups.

I have a confession to make.  

I still let my 3 year old drink out of a sippy cup.  

Go ahead, judge me.  I am hanging my head in shame.  Bad mommy!

I guess I do it out of convenience.  There are less spills and messes with the sippy cup.  Now I will say I only give it to him in the morning with his milk.  Otherwise, during the day he gets a regular cup sans lid.  

But today was the straw that broke the camels back per se.

I was cleaning up around the house and noticed a sippy cup.  I don't know how long it had been hanging around and it looked empty, but definitely used.  I took it to the sink, opened it up to wash it out and about passed out from the stench that came out of the cup.  It literally smelled like someone vomited in the cup, added vinegar and sulfur and let it cook in the sun for a few days.  

P.U.T.R.I.D.

R.O.T.T.E.N.

S.T.A.N.K.

N.A.S.T.Y.

This topped any bad smell I've ever experience before in my life.  By far.  And I have three kids. 

 

Enough said.

Needless to say, the sippy cups are making their way to the trash a new home in T minus 6 days.  I had to give Luke advanced warning.  He turns 4 next Tuesday so I told him that on his birthday the sippy cups go bye-bye.  

Adios puke cups - you will not be missed  (at least not by me).

Face Painting

Last night at the gym the child care workers were doing face paintings for the kids.  Carson of course would not participate.  He doesn't like unwanted attention and the thought of someone painting his face does not appeal to him.  

Luke on the other hand was thrilled.  When I came to pick them up after Turbo Kick class the girls told me Luke had asked for them to paint a butterfly on his cheek.  So I am thinking ok, that is fine, I bet they made it a cool camouflage "manly-boyish" butterfly. 

Then I spotted Luke in the back of the room.

Apparently, he requested a pink butterfly.  I may need to have a talk with this boy in the near future, but for now he is rocking the pink butterfly as cute as can be.

Park Adventures

Yesterday it was actually warm enough to take a trip to a park.  We still needed a light jacket because of the wind, but the sun was out and it felt great to get some fresh air.  

It was just Luke and I since the other boys were at school.  There were a handful of other kids Luke's age so it worked out pretty well.  This one boy was running around yelling "booby trap!" and a girl was following right behind him repeating the phrase, "booby crap!"  It was hilarious.

   

Luke is such a people pleaser and just wants to be friends with every kid he meets.  Except this one particular boy.  The kid had to be just 2 years old, but man was he aggressive.  He had spiked hair and wore red chucks - super cute but ornery.

It first started when bully boy and his sister pointed at Luke, called him an alien, and screamed and ran away from him.  I was a little irritated at the alien comment but figured they were just playing an innocent game of tag and Luke was "it" whether he liked it or not.  Luke continued to play by himself while being cautious yet curious about the other kids.  

Bully boy runs up to Luke as he is trying to make his way to the slide and grabs on to the back of his shirt.  All the while his mom is deep in conversation with her friend and isn't even paying attention.  I could tell Luke was trying not to get upset, but he looked like he could burst into tears at any moment.  Luke got away from bully boy and came over to me.  I told him to try and stay away from those kids and play on something else. 

So he happily goes over to the spider climbing contraption which no one else was on.  And wouldn't you know it, bully boy goes right over to him and starts pulling on his leg as Luke is trying to climb.  

I was PISSED!  

I marched over to the kid, got down on his level and firmly told him not to touch my child again.  I think I may have scared him off, but at least he got the message and finally left Luke alone.  I could care less what him mom thought if she even witnessed the encounter which I highly doubt.

I could see the hurt in my sweet little Luke's eyes as he told me, "That boy is not my friend." 

I saw a man walking his dog nearby and asked Luke if he wanted to go see the dog in an attempt to try and boost his hurt feelings .  Of course that made him happy.  The dog was very sweet and the man reminded me of my dad.  That was until he started talking about his dog's rectum surgery.  Oh look at the time, we must get going.  TMI!

Hopefully our next park adventure will not involve bullies or dog butt conversation.

Oh so pretty

Just when I thought I had nothing to talk about, one of my boys comes to my rescue and provides me with yet another comical story.  

Luke was in the family room watching TV (or so we thought) while the  hubby and I were in the kitchen finishing up installing a new dishwasher.  I may or may not have been observing the installation while drinking coffee, but that's not the point.  The other night I started a load of dishes in the old dishwasher and half way into the wash I notice water seeping out all over the kitchen floor.  That's all I needed to see for me to request a new one.  The old dishwasher needed to be replaced before we bought the house.  

I glance over to the family room and see Luke's arm waving over the couch as he peeks over.  

I wave back thinking he's just being a cute 3 year old boy.  But then he did it again and had that guilty look on his face and I knew he was up to something.  

He holds his hand up once more and I notice something shimmery as he's wiggling his fingers.  I walk over to him and take a closer look.  He said, "I have pretty fingers!"  Ugh - This is what I saw.

It's a little hard to tell from the picture, but Luke had painted his fingernails.  Apparently, he went into the bathroom and saw my "cotton candy" colored polish and decided he wanted his nails to look like mine.  This child is right handed, but he painted the nails of his right hand which means he used his left hand to do the job.  I was seriously impressed with how well he had done, but was not happy at the fact that he actually painted his nails. 

I attempted to explain to him that most of the time only girls and mommy's paint their nails.  

And he was so sweet about it and just said, "Oh."  It was like he understood, but it was kind of a let down.  He liked his pretty sparkly nails.  Yikes!

Seen and heard at Wally-Mart

If you're ever hurting for blog material I highly recommend taking a trip to your local Wally-Mart and roaming the isles where you will find plenty of material to share. 

Today's trip was no exception.  

Luke and I needed to stop in and pick up a few items.  Our town, unfortunately, does not have a "super" Wally-Mart so I can't get all my grocery shopping done in one stop, which irritates me immensely.  I mean, how long before they stock back up on toaster strudels?  They've been out for 2 weeks.  Does Wally-Mart not know how these are a staple in our house.  And I sure can't get them at my other grocery store (Aldi).  The boys are having T.S. withdrawals.  

Anyway, we're walking through the store and Luke is happily laying in the cart with his feet hanging over the edge which garnered a few smiles and laughs from other shoppers.  As he was looking up at the ceiling (as only a kid would do) he said to me, "Look up at the cupcakes."  Now either my child is hallucinating or Wally-Mart has a strange way of advertising baked goods.  

I look up and at first could not figure out what he was referring to.  Finally, I got it.  There were these sprinklers on the ceiling that resembled copper cupcake liners.  Imagine viewing this from the other direction.  I though how very observant of him it was to come up with that.   (Next time you're in the store, check out the ceiling, you may even see a real bird like the ones that live in the store back in Indiana.)  

We kept on shopping and wouldn't you know it, in true 3 year old fashion, I hear, "Mom - I have to go potty."  But of course.  Never fails.  We head to the back of the store, park the cart, and go into the bathrooms, which smelled really good, surprisingly.  I am not sure if it was the soap or air freshener, but it was quite delightful.  

We were the only one's in there until a lady walked in, I'd say about my age or maybe a little younger and she was talking wildly fast on her cell phone.  She continued to speed talk while she entered the stall and went on as we heard her do her thing AND flush.  Not once did she pause or explain to the person on the other end where she was or "could I call you back in 2 minutes."  Hopefully the speed at which she was talking muffled the sound of nature's call. Unbelievable.  Then of all things, she didn't even wash her hands!  Ugh!  She just kept chatting as she walked right out of the bathroom.  

When we finished, we headed out past the electronics department.  There was a display of about 5 large flat screen TV's listed as 20% off.  A guy with a deep southern drawl said to an employee of the store, "I give you $1000 bucks in cash for this here TV."  

Since when can you price haggle at Wally-Mart?  Heck, when I got up to the register I wanted to try this technique.  Could you imagine the look on the cashier's face if I said, "I will offer you 89 cents for this pack of gum, deal?"  Or how about this one, "I would like to buy two and get one free on the milk today."  We're not at a garage sale.  Last time I checked, the price you pay is the price on the sticker.  Maybe I am missing something.  Someone please clue me in.  I don't know what the outcome was if the guy got the TV at his bargain price or not.

Last we stopped in the toy section.  Not because I wanted to, but it was pretty much unavoidable.  We were perusing the books, and did you know that you can purchase your very own Jesus doll?  Who knew he came in doll form?  Jesus as a toy?  Don't get me wrong, I love me some Jesus, but the toy version just seems so strange and in a sense, wrong.  Would  Jenny from Chased by Children care to take off on this one and add her thoughts?  For some reason I can sense her insight on this topic.  

I mean really, would you store him with your daughters Barbies?  I know there could be great witness opportunities there.

Or maybe your child already has a Jesus doll.  How is that working out?  And what role playing and dialogue have you seen played out?  I'm just curious. 

I can just see what's next, the Pope doll.  

It looks like that's been done too, in action figure form.

How about this one.  No collection could be complete without a baby being dropped in a bowl of M&M's.  Or is that an alien with really large eyes?  It's hard to tell.  And are those really M&M's or did baby have a very colorful accident?

This post has completely gone off on a tangent - but it's all in good humor. 

Church food

I was baffled the other day when Luke came up to me saying he was hungry and wanted 'church food.'

"Church food, what is that?" I asked Luke throwing out options that I guessed may be some kind of snack they gave the kids.

"Goldfish?"  

No.

"Graham crackers?"

No.

"Cheese stick?"

No.

"Vanilla wafers."

No.

What the heck would be considered church food? I wondered.  So I asked Luke if we had church food in our house and if he would show me.  He took my hand, walked me to the refrigerator, opened the door and pointed to the top shelf.  

"That momma, church food, up there."

On the top shelf were eggs, yogurt, sticks of butter, and a casserole dish.  

"Ah-ha!  I got it now, you want a yogurt, right Luke?"

"NO! I want THAT church food!" he demanded.

Finally, I realized what on God's earth he was talking about.  I had made a cinnamon roll french toast dish for bible study on Wednesday and there were a few pieces left.  I told the kids they couldn't have any unless there were leftovers because it was for church - hence the 'church food' classification.  

Luckily, he got his wish and was a happy boy. He just brought a whole other meaning to the phrase 'soul food'. 

"Church Food"

(a.k.a. Cinnamon French Toast Bake)

• 1/4 cup butter, melted
• 2 cans refrigerated cinnamon rolls with icing (12.4 oz each)
• 6 eggs
• 1/2 cup half and half (or heavy whipping cream)
• 2 tsp ground cinnamon
• 2 tsp vanilla
• 1 cup chopped pecans (optional)
• 1 cup syrup

Heat oven to 375.  Pour melted butter into ungreased 13x9 glass baking dish.  Separate each can of dough into 8 rolls (set icing aside). Cut each roll into 8 pieces; place pieces over butter in dish.

In medium bowl with wire whisk, beat eggs. Beat in cream, cinnamon and vanilla until well blended. Gently pour over roll pieces. Sprinkle with pecans (optional), drizzle with 1 cup syrup.

Bake uncovered for 20 - 28 minutes or until golden brown. Cool 15 minutes.

Microwave icing (10 - 15 sec) or until drizzling consistency.

Drizzle icing over top.

Manners 101

Luke walks up to me after drinking his "bunny" milk (Nesquick - the bunny on the front, get it?) - anyway - he drinks his milk really fast so you know there's some air that needs to get back up.  

He lets out this obnoxious loud burp and of course giggles because burps are the funniest noise when you're a 3 year old boy.  Who am I kidding, guys of all ages still think they are the funniest noise along with farts.  

I, being the polite lady in the house, try to instill some manners with the boys, so after he burped I waited for him to say excuse me.  It was apparent to me that the politeness I expected was going to need some prompting so I said to him, "Luke, what do you say?"

He responds, "Thank you!" 

We've got some work to do in the appropriate response of the manners department, but at least we're on the right track.

School pictures

Every year I send out the kids school pictures with our Christmas cards.  This year was no different with the exception of one of the boys.  Luke.  His pre-school waits until February to take school pictures.  Why?  I don't know.  So, I had to send out the cards without Luke's sweet face in them.  I did, however, include a little piece of paper explaining why there were only two of the three boys pictures included.

So now it's February.  I had taken Luke to get his hair trimmed a week or so before picture day.  He was all cute and ready to be photographed.  And then the morning of picture day, he wakes up with a fever and can't go to school.  

No problem.  I figured we'd just have it done on retake day, but when I called the school to let them know, I was informed that today is the only day to get pictures taken.  There are no retakes.  

Seriously?  

Yep.    

So now I am stuck with having to get them done on my own.  I wonder if any of these would work?

I guess I'll start looking around for some good deals.  Any suggestions?  

Bird defense

Lately I have noticed an increase in the number of birds in this area - specifically in our backyard. 

They come in flocks and like to congregate in every square foot of our yard.  

I can't even get the dog to scare them off, but I think I've found the secret weapon.  

Watch and see.

We may have even scared the neighbors in the process.